Business Trip Series – Leaving the Kids

I recently traveled to New Orleans for a work conference. Leading up to the trip, I was looking forward to a change from my daily routine and visiting a new city. In the very early morning of my departure, I tried tip toeing around the house trying not to wake anyone, but my four-year-old son woke and broke out into tears clinging on to me with all his strength as the cab waited outside for me. My heart broke.

The feeling of guilt that I felt as I closed the door behind me and hopped into a cab was unbearable. I left my weeping child in my husband’s arms as I scurried off to the airport. “What kind of mother am I?” I thought.

Leading up to my departure date, as a family we had discussed how mommy would be leaving for a few days. We explained to the kids how they needed to take care of daddy and of each other to make sure everyone was being nice and staying out of trouble while mommy was away. I made it a point to start talking about my trip a few days in advance to get them prepared for the idea that mommy won’t be home. Though my son understood that I was taking the plane and would be away for a few days, I guess it didn’t sink until he saw me leaving the morning of my trip.

On my way to the airport, I felt guilty and questioned if it was worth leaving my kids behind in such an emotional state to travel for work. I started questioning the quantity and quality time I spend with them, wondering how it would impact their development and on and on. You know, the usual mommy guilt.

Later that evening, after being away for one day, I spoke with my husband to see how things were going and to get an update on my poor little boy’s emotional stay. “Amazing, he is awesome. He stopped crying two minutes after you left and all is good.” “Really?”, I thought to myself slightly disappointed. Don’t get me wrong, I am happy to not have scarred him for life and that he was able to get over it, but part of me realized that I am no longer the center of his world and that he is starting to become his own person with things to do and people to see. This was a tough realization.

In hindsight, all the talking and discussing about my upcoming travels was really for me and not my kids. I was the one who needed to prepare mentally and emotionally about the fact that I wouldn’t be there to make them breakfast in the morning or cuddle them at night.

In my opinion, as parents, we tend to create our own emotional distress and, in the end, the kids are fine. It’s actually the parents that are not fine. These little ones learn to adapt and roll with the punches surprisingly well, and we should learn a thing or two from them.

How do you cope with being away from your kids?

Feature Photo Credit: www.futuretravelexperience.com